Funniest video you’ll see today, click here.

Well I bought parts to build a new computer yesterday.  Why? 
Well my current computer is getting a little old. I got it before I
started my sophmore year of college and it’s been easily the best
computer I’ve ever had but it had some issues last weekend and I’ve
been considering getting a new one for a little while now.  And
yesterday was the last day I could get double miles on all purchases so
I decided to go for it.  I only spent $400 and it’s gonna be a
sweeeet computer. If you’re wondering what it will look like, this is the
case.

Even further proof of my stupidity: Yesterday I left work, drove out of
the parking lot and was waiting at the stop light when I realized I had
forgotten my cell phone and then looking to see if I had forgotten
anything else realized I forgot my keys. So I did a U-turn, drove back
to the office and was concocting a scheme to break into my office since
I had locked myself out and as I got out realized that the keys were in
the ignition of the car.

I’m sure you’ve seen all those “We support our troops” yellow ribbons
on the back of cars and so my dad wanted to get one so we went to Job
Lot and picked one up.   Did you know it’s a magnet and not a
sticker?  How much more fake a supporter can you get? When you get
sick of supporting the troops, bam, you take the magnet off.  What
kind of bullshit is that?   They make bumper stickers for
crappy bands, dumb phrases and misguided christians, yet supporting our
troops is something not deserving of a more permanent fixture?


Song of the Day: Men At Work – Who Can It Be Now?

I did my civic duty and voted today.  I got the little “I voted”
sticker.  And I hate to say it, but my vote doesn’t count. 
Being from a state that is not a “battleground state”, everyone knows
who’s going to win Connecticut so it seems rather dumb.  But I
voted anyway, despite the fact that it took me a few minutes to figure
out how to work the stupid voting machine.  I’m not even sure I
got it right but whomever invented that device was definetly an idiot
because it just makes no sense.  So who knows if my votes actually
went through but hey, I got my sticker.

You know I feel sorry for?  All those people on the ballot after
the president.  Everyone goes in there looking to vote for the
president and then they see a list of all these other people running
for office.  The first reaction is, “Who the hell are these guys?”
and then you feel compelled to vote for somebody.  Some vote
purely by party lines, others vote by who sounds like they’d do a
better job based purely on how their name sounds and then there’s my
personal favorite: making a pattern with the votes!  These poor
guys are purely at the mercy of hoping that their position in the
voting machine helps complete my peace symbol on the ballot.  

Quote of the day while heard driving to work during heavy traffic on
the radio: “..and for those of you on I-95, put it in first and throw a
frisbee around ‘cuz you’re going no where.”

I realized that while at Six Flags that I’ve become a “screamer”. 
I never used to make any sound on those rides but it seems I have no
choice but to scream during any sort of inversion.  I try not to,
but it just comes out.  Is it like a peer pressure thing? 
Maybe there’s just one dude who really is a screamer and the rest of us
are like “Shit, I’m enjoying this double cobra roll too…” and then
let out a scream?  

Honestly now, why is the Christmas stuff being brought out this
early?  Do all you tree worshipers need to be starting this so far
in advance?  It used to be that the Christmas season began after
Thanksgiving.  Well you would think it was December 2, not
November 2 if you walked into the mall and saw all the decorations they
had up.  It’s ridiculous.  

I got a pair of new shoes yesterday from American Eagle partly because
my old pair had no heel left in them(just the material on the outside)
and holes in the bottom of the shoes.  I loved that shoe
though.  I bought it on my birthday two years ago in the mall with
the girl whom I took to my senior prom.  Anyway, these new ones
look alot like the old ones but the one thing I hate about new shoes is
driving with them.  It always feels like you’ve got a brick
attached to the bottom of your feet whenever you try to drive in new
shoes.   With a pair of well-broken in shoes, you can control
the gas and brake pedals with one of your toes if need be but with new
shoes, you need to just slam your foot in the general area of the pedal
and hope you’re hitting the right one.

According to my desk calendar it’s election day today in the United
States and “Day of the Dead” in Mexico.  Honestly, I’d prefer to
celebrate Day of the Dead.  Why?  It’s pretty obvious; on
election day, you waste a half hour in line voting for who you want
president and then arbitrarely vote for whoever else is on the
ballot.  But Day of the Dead is all about zombies!  Instead
of the regular commute, you must navigate a maze of zombies and other
things.  Ok, so basically I think Day of the Dead sounds cooler
and perhaps thats the reason I’m more interested in it but damn it, it
makes sense to me.

Song of the Day: Creedence Clearwater Revival – Fortunate Son

Oh man, big Bon Jovi news.  First, there’s a new box set coming out in November and more importantly, a new record in the spring and a tour! 
I might hold off on buying the boxed set and let someone get it for me
for Hannukah or my birthday but I’m mighty tempted to waste some money
on it.  As for the tour tickets, I can’t wait for those bad boys
to go on sale.  Their tour in 2003 was awesome and am looking
forward to another great tour next summer.

I saw The Grudge last night and it was scary.  Staci didn’t think
it was that good and I wont say it was great but I thought it was
different; it’s not your standard slasher horror movie.  Very
odd.  There were one or two scenes where it was like “Holy shit!”
and jump out of your seat scary.  The rest was just resonating
scary; the kind of scary that scares you in your head mentally. 
When I got home I popped a few anti-anxiety pills and slept with the TV
on.  I guess it worked because I really didn’t have all that much
trouble falling asleep, although I’ll admit I was a little freaked out.

Believe it or not, the last movie to scare me shitless was the
Mummy.  The scene where the mummy lures one of the cowboys in, who
was previously blinded by the mummy and then proceeds to rip out his
tongue just did not sit well with me and I refuse to see that
movie. 

Tonight, I’m getting shitfaced!  Oh yes, I have no regard for the
fact I’m tired nor the fact that I have work tomorrow.  Me and
Staci are going nuts.  There’s a party at Yale where it’s $1 beers
and $2 Long Island iced teas and the theme is “Frat party”.  The
dress suggestions are: Women, think freshman year.  Men, think
“that guy.” I had an outfit I was gonna wear but now it’s gonna be
straight up TKE garb.  One of my best TKE shirts, beatup jeans and
my wild disregard for sobriety.  Plan of action(as of now) is to
pregame at Staci’s place and then take a cab to Yale, party, go to some
bars/clubs then return to the party to finish out the night.  I
know tomorrow I will be a zombie(make that a zombie with an enormous
hangover) but fuck it, I’m going nuts.  I’m going to be partying
like it’s 2002!

Song of the Day: Kevin Lyttle – Turn Me On

I got a letter yesterday in the mail from my J.crew card saying
basically that I took too long to not pay them back and now the repo
men were gonna come after me.  Needless to say, I figured it was
time to pay that card off allready.  And I wasn’t so much
concerned about the repo men as I was that my parents would find
out.  Sadly, I’m 22(almost 23) years old and I’m still afraid of
the wrath of my parents.  I can engange in illegal downloading of
stuff, trafficking of drugs even go to prison, but please….don’t tell
my mom! 

Speaking of the law, last night my internet provider
called me to tell me that they recorded a port scan coming from my IP
address over the weekend.  For you non-nerds out there, port scans
are a malicious activity.  But this time, I was innocent! 
Back in the day, I did all that sort of stuff and got myself(and the
family) kicked off and banned from a few different internet
providers.  But I’m a reformed man now and the worse that I do
online now is propogate the spread of cheesy links across AIM.  In
the words of Richard Nixon, “People have got to know whether or not
their president is a crook. Well, I’m not a crook.”

Why don’t the Yankees just walk David Ortiz allready?  He’s the
only guy on the team with the big hits so when there’s men on base in
the 12th inning at like 2:00AM, just walk the guy and deal with some
other loser.  I’m sure the next guy up never even bothers getting
ready because for the last few games, whenever he’s been on deck, Ortiz
wins the game for them so I’m sure that guy on deck pretty much assumes
he wont have to do anything.  Proving my theory right, Mr.
Steinbrenner can make my check out to M-A-T-T-H-E-W  
H-O-C-H-B-E-R-G.

35 days until my ass is laying on the deck of a cruise ship in the middle of the caribeean!

Song of the Day: The Killers – Somebody Told Me

Congrats to my little sister Naomi will become a bat mitzvah tomorrow.  Mazal Tov!

Song of the Day: Johnny Rivers – Where Have All The Flowers Gone

Well in case you’ve been living under a rock these past few days and
didn’t take a chance to IM me, I’ll clue you in on what’s been going
on.  This Thanksgiving myself and my family were supposed to go to
Jamaica for Nomi’s bat mitzvah.  However, Jamaica Air called us
and told us that they had to change our flight and that we’d have to
make a stop before getting to our final destination. Therefore, my
parents axed the trip and instead we’re going on a Disney cruise to the
Bahamas.    I’m super psyched about it.

Song of the Day: Pinocchio – When You Wish Upon A Star

I’ve been playing this game for the past week and it’s addictive! Play at your own risk: http://www.jurjans.lv/stuff/net/freenet.htm

Memo to the drivers of automobiles in the state of Connecticut:

Attention morons (that’s you).  It has come to my attention that
you cannot drive a motor vehicle properly.  You all find the need
to purchase extravegant cars yet you clearly do not know how to work
some of the basic parts of the vehicle, such as the gas pedal.  I
know it’s somewhat difficult, but the brakes are the LEFT pedal and the
gas is the RIGHT pedal. Some of you must have it confused as you’ve
been hitting your brakes as if you have the two confused.  It has
also come to my attention that perhaps you’ve forgotten what they
taught you in driving class, specifically driving distance.  

You see, when driving on the highway, you should be doing at least the
speed limit, and let’s face it, everyone speeds.  You don’t need
to do 90, but I think we can manage 70 or 75.  And to those of you
who think the left lane was constructured purely for you to do 60,
well, you’re a complete idiot. If you can’t do at least 75, get out of
the left lane!  The right lane is for slow pokes, women,
immigrants who think the speed limit is in kilometers per hour and old
people.  Still confused? Well if you’ve got people honking at you
and flashing their lights, it’s not because they’re saying hi or
congratulating you on your promotion, but rather, you can’t drive and
so get out of the way.  Some of you are under the impression you
must have a 20 minute following distance.  Wrong.  You should
be able to clearly read the license plate or see whatever dumb crap is
in the backseat of the car ahead of you.  

This brings me to incliment weather.  Here’s the bottom line, just
because you see some rain, doesn’t mean you have to do no more than
45.  Rain just means turn on the wipers, not become the official
brake tester of the highway.  It is possible to go the speed limit
in rain and just because it’s raining does not mean your car will
definetly wipe out if you go past 40.  You see, around the wheels
of your car are these things called tires.  They’re designed and
built to handle more than just 75 and sunny.  

So in conclusion, please learn to drive or get the hell out of my way.

Song of the Day: Queen – Bohemnian Rhapsody

Another weekend is over and another work week has begun.  This
past weekend was nothing fun.  Friday & Saturday were Yom
Kippur and so it’s not like I was out and about.  But during my
fast, I did take some time to reflect on mistakes I’ve made over the
past year.  I’ll be the first to admit that I’m an idiot and make
mistakes.  And what I wanted to really reflect on was my personal
relationships.  I feel like I’ve alienated some for dumb and/or no
reason, lost touch with others and kept others at arms length
apart.  I’d like to mend some of the burnt bridges and shorten
others, if I can.  It’s easy to write it here but I know that when
I go to pick up the phone to call, it’s alot harder.  More than
anything, I hope not to make the same mistakes again.

I drove my sister to the airport yesterday and in the end, did not go
to the Durham fair.  My mom told me to go on the way back but I
was not about to go there alone like some friggin loser.  One of
these years I will go.  And as I write this, I realize I’ll be
missing San Generro this year.  I loved that festival, going there
with Rich and Crystal, hardly being able to walk, seeing if we can
muster the strength to walk the entire length, and trying to find a
dude selling a Suvlaki sandwich for the cheapest price as well as
spotting celebrities.  It was fun and I’ll miss it.

Song of the Day: Night Ranger – Sister Christian

The worst holiday of them all is upon us….Yom Kippur.  For you
non-Jews(shame, shame, shame!), it’s the day of repentence and it means
the longest(and most boring) service tonight followed by a 24 hour
fast.  It’s terrible.  Of course, no one ever said it’s easy
being Jewish…

My heartfelt condolonces to Paloma for her loss.  I can’t begin to
imagine what it’s like to lose a parent and my thoughts will be with
you and your family in this time of need.  I hope this tough time
will pass you by quickly and better days will come soon.

Song of the Day: Jackyl – I Stand Alone